# Ugliest bike ever??



## mr plow (Mar 22, 2005)

Is this the ugliest bike ever?
Would anyone buy one of these?
Can anyone top it??


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## SHIVER ME TIMBERS (Jan 12, 2004)

can you say Norco....looks like one


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## donboyfisher (Jul 20, 2004)

man thats ugly....

why make the shock so exposed?


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## O~Hi~O (Feb 24, 2005)

*No offense to the owner of this one!*

But this is the uggliest bike I've seen in awhile...is this a road rider who rides mtn. bikes now? I can't see how those bars would be effective...


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## mr plow (Mar 22, 2005)

And who would want to ride a 'Cock'??  
Bike looks sweet but the marketing department needs help!!


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## MorphineAddict (Mar 19, 2004)

mr plow said:


> And who would want to ride a 'Cock'??
> Bike looks sweet but the marketing department needs help!!


Can you say Evil Imp? :rollseyes:


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## zedro (Jan 12, 2004)

SHIVER ME TIMBERS said:


> can you say Norco....looks like one


 not a single thing about it looks like or ressembles a Norco....must be the beer goggles....


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## shiggy (Dec 19, 1998)

I was waiting for that. 

_"I can't see how those bars would be effective..."_
Don't worry. Most people are wearing blinders.


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## O~Hi~O (Feb 24, 2005)

SHIVER ME TIMBERS said:


> can you say Norco....looks like one


 This is a norco chump  ...a far cry from that heap up top.


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## O~Hi~O (Feb 24, 2005)

shiggy said:


> I was waiting for that.
> 
> _"I can't see how those bars would be effective..."_
> Don't worry. Most people are wearing blinders.


You've got a nice bike shiggy...it's just that your color scheme(fenders, bars, stem) makes it look like crap and those bars are good for that dude on here that makes bike parts into household items...they'd make a good towel rack. 

BTW, your horse is the one with blinders.


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## SHIVER ME TIMBERS (Jan 12, 2004)

O~Hi~O said:


> But this is the uggliest bike I've seen in awhile...is this a road rider who rides mtn. bikes now? I can't see how those bars would be effective...


Shiggy is a hippy...that explains everything


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## e<i>o (May 22, 2004)

SHIVER ME TIMBERS said:


> can you say Norco....looks like one


Looks like a damn sockeye salmon....


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## SHIVER ME TIMBERS (Jan 12, 2004)

O~Hi~O said:


> This is a norco chump  ...a far cry from that heap up top.


old norcos...DAMMM


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## SHIVER ME TIMBERS (Jan 12, 2004)

zedro said:


> not a single thing about it looks like or ressembles a Norco....must be the beer goggles....


weird angle monocoque


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## SHIVER ME TIMBERS (Jan 12, 2004)

e[I said:


> o]Looks like a damn sockeye salmon....


step back from the keyboards...you are all right...just lay down and let whatever is happening to you wear off...man you are messed up today


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## COmtbiker12 (Jan 12, 2004)

mr plow said:


> And who would want to ride a 'Cock'??
> Bike looks sweet but the marketing department needs help!!


 hehehehe, you said Cock. lol


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## zedro (Jan 12, 2004)

SHIVER ME TIMBERS said:


> weird angle monocoque


 i wouldnt say...


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## Shibby (Jan 13, 2004)

I can honestly say that I cannot find a single thing that I like about the bike (the green POS, not the Norco)


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## zedro (Jan 12, 2004)

Shibby said:


> I can honestly say that I cannot find a single thing that I like about the bike (the green POS, not the Norco)


 whoever designed it has not a single clue about good design it seems, that front section is mind boggling


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## .WestCoastHucker. (Jan 14, 2004)

looks mostly like one of those ugly lenzsport bikes....


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## VIA (Feb 12, 2004)

well...
this one is fugly for me but don't know if as or more fugly that that one..


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## MorphineAddict (Mar 19, 2004)

VIA said:


> well...
> this one is fugly for me but don't know if as or more fugly that that one..


Good Lord!  WTF is that?!?


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## nnn (Feb 1, 2005)

Talk about moto style...


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## VIA (Feb 12, 2004)

from fugly to foglyer..


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## XSL_WiLL (Nov 2, 2004)

The top tube looks like it would be extremely painful to rack oneself on... Hahah... Cock... Looks just like a Evil Imperial. But hey, if it works, I'd buy one.


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## Tracerboy (Oct 13, 2002)

I guess some manufacturers were a bit confused. Those would be pretty cool to put one of those sound boxes on that make the bike sound like a motorcycle. Can you just imagine the old folks on the trails. Hey you, motorcycles aren't allowed on this trail, lol.


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## Shibby (Jan 13, 2004)

zedro said:


> whoever designed it has not a single clue about good design it seems, that front section is mind boggling


 I don't have a single clue about design either, but I know I could do better than that...


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## MorphineAddict (Mar 19, 2004)

VIA said:


> from fugly to foglyer..


It's got a backwards banana seat. Who da funk thunk that up?


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## misctwo (Oct 24, 2004)

VIA said:


> from fugly to foglyer..


not too bad actually....it's trying way too hard to be MX though...

but this one....even the saddle looks like ASS


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## ironhorsebike1 (Dec 5, 2004)

those are all pretty ugly. the norco's are ok. but shiggy, man that be one ugly-a$s bike.


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## misctwo (Oct 24, 2004)

ironhorsebike1 said:


> those are all pretty ugly. the norco's are ok. but shiggy, man that be one ugly-a$s bike.


norcos are ass ugly too. i'm sick of people being soft on norcos. along with Tomacs, i don't know what happened to Bradbury's Manitou FS aesthetic..


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## ironhorsebike1 (Dec 5, 2004)

some tomac's are gnar. but not the prettiest. wooo 300th post.


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## scabrider (Oct 3, 2004)

the ugliest bike is the honda dh bike, the second picture is pretty bad though.


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## e<i>o (May 22, 2004)

SHIVER ME TIMBERS said:


> step back from the keyboards...you are all right...just lay down and let whatever is happening to you wear off...man you are messed up today


Beer........(cough cough).......beer.....Arghhhhhhh.......(cough cough).........please help.....................I need beer...........


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## JBsoxB (May 18, 2004)

scabrider said:


> the ugliest bike is the honda dh bike, the second picture is pretty bad though.


what's up w/ that seat!?


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## SHIVER ME TIMBERS (Jan 12, 2004)

VIA said:


> from fugly to foglyer..


i want one


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## SHIVER ME TIMBERS (Jan 12, 2004)

zedro said:


> i wouldnt say...


What is the matter w/ you zedro...I said it reminds me of a norco......if you take the 2 frames and maybe seperate them by design for a few years to let them evolve...they could be made by the same company.....come on here this isn't rocket science. I thought you were smarter than this Zedro... someone needs a hammer to the head to start thinking


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## ironhorsebike1 (Dec 5, 2004)

scabrider said:


> the ugliest bike is the honda dh bike, the second picture is pretty bad though.


the new hondas are sick though. maybe look goofy but fo sho are gnar.


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## E30Evolution (Sep 18, 2004)

ironhorsebike1 said:


> the new hondas are sick though. maybe look goofy but fo sho are gnar.


Hell yeah they are..

Their drivetrain setup is the shitz.


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## JBsoxB (May 18, 2004)

E30Evolution said:


> Hell yeah they are..
> 
> Their drivetrain setup is the shitz.


but imagine what would happen if your chain came off 

that would be a mofo to fix!


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## misctwo (Oct 24, 2004)

SHIVER ME TIMBERS said:


> What is the matter w/ you zedro...I said it reminds me of a norco......if you take the 2 frames and maybe seperate them by design for a few years to let them evolve...they could be made by the same company.....come on here this isn't rocket science. I thought you were smarter than this Zedro... someone needs a hammer to the head to start thinking


i would even go as far as to say that the norco is uglier than the HT whatever the fk it is.


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## flatulentfox (Aug 27, 2004)

*quite ugly*

ugly indeed


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## misctwo (Oct 24, 2004)

flatulentfox said:


> ugly indeed


how does Mountain Cycle stay in business? maybe a nice new thread topic....


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## mr plow (Mar 22, 2005)

I forgot to mention that this heap retails for over 3000 euros in Europe!
How is this possible?? Thats a sh*tload of money!!!


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## mr plow (Mar 22, 2005)

This one aint pretty but looks like it can get the job done!


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## karpiel666 (Jan 7, 2005)

*Poor shiggy*

people will just never leave his bike alone, those dirt drops are sweet for sprinting, climbing and they prevent stomach core samples.


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## mr plow (Mar 22, 2005)

This one is just wrong!!!


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## finchy (Jan 21, 2004)

i think shiggy took the cake on owning the ugliest bike for 2005


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## SHIVER ME TIMBERS (Jan 12, 2004)

mr plow said:


> This one aint pretty but looks like it can get the job done!


shivers.......


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## SHIVER ME TIMBERS (Jan 12, 2004)

misctwo said:


> norcos are ass ugly too. i'm sick of people being soft on norcos. along with Tomacs, i don't know what happened to Bradbury's Manitou FS aesthetic..


thank you very much misc2


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## mr plow (Mar 22, 2005)

It should be a crime to do this to an Intense!


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## NRTH SHORE (Jan 24, 2004)

*wow*

that is fugly .. how does the suspention work on the HT it doesn't look like it could work ....


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## O~Hi~O (Feb 24, 2005)

scabrider said:


> the ugliest bike is the honda dh bike, the second picture is pretty bad though.


The second bike looks like a rockers guitar(the frame that is)


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## O~Hi~O (Feb 24, 2005)

misctwo said:


> i would even go as far as to say that the norco is uglier than the HT whatever the fk it is.


Look at this chump instigating, you trying to get a "fist full of steel"

-Rage


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## O~Hi~O (Feb 24, 2005)

SHIVER ME TIMBERS said:


> thank you very much misc2


 bah...


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## zedro (Jan 12, 2004)

SHIVER ME TIMBERS said:


> I thought you were smarter than this Zedro... someone needs a hammer to the head to start thinking


 maybe as i designer i see things differently and more effectively....like how alot of people cant seem to see that a VPP is completly different than a DW


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## COmtbiker12 (Jan 12, 2004)

zedro said:


> maybe as i designer i see things differently and more effectively....like how alot of people cant seem to see that a VPP is completly different than a DW


 That's because people are stupid and don't think reasonably. Even aesthetically the dw is way different than vpp


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## misctwo (Oct 24, 2004)

mr plow said:


> This one is just wrong!!!


not bad looking parts but put together it's like looking at my bosses wife....chunder...god i wish she was hot, i'd do her.


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## zedro (Jan 12, 2004)

COmtbiker12 said:


> That's because people are stupid and don't think reasonably. Even aesthetically the dw is way different than vpp


 yeah people fixate on a generic item and base entire comparisons off them, it irks me some. If you're gonna compare monocoques, compare them on their own merit, not simply because they are both basic monocoque layouts (especially if one is horrendously executed with sharp corners and zero flow). Thats all i'm getting at.


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## misctwo (Oct 24, 2004)

O~Hi~O said:


> Look at this chump instigating, you trying to get a "fist full of steel"
> 
> -Rage


chill man....don't be a playa hata....


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## bikescars101 (Jan 13, 2005)

Europeans. Figures.


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## JBsoxB (May 18, 2004)

mr plow said:


> It should be a crime to do this to an Intense!


ya i know! that fender totally throws off the look...


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## misctwo (Oct 24, 2004)

mr plow said:


> It should be a crime to do this to an Intense!


it's been "commuterized"


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## JBsoxB (May 18, 2004)

NRTH SHORE said:


> that is fugly .. how does the suspention work on the HT it doesn't look like it could work ....


ya. what is the top of the shock hooked onto?


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## zedro (Jan 12, 2004)

JBsoxB said:


> ya. what is the top of the shock hooked onto?


 its a linkage fork which used to be more common in the 90s, and the shock is simply attached to the opposing horizontal linkages.


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## BikeSATORI (Mar 20, 2004)

man, this stuff is funny as hell.
I believe in function over form, but man, some of these are just ridiculous! That original one looks like it would rip your nuts off in one bad dismount.
and for the moto style ones, I can see the reasoning behind those seats, does anyone else here ride mx??


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## AlanB (Jan 12, 2004)

*That's why I bought it!*



misctwo said:


> norcos are ass ugly too.


 Yup. Mine won't win any beauty contests.

And to think that some people actually chose a bike 'cause it's great to ride. What fools!


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## MorphineAddict (Mar 19, 2004)

AlanB said:


> Yup. Mine won't win any beauty contests.
> 
> And to think that some people actually chose a bike 'cause it's great to ride. What fools!


Dude, AlanB, cool a$$ avatar.


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## evil13 (Jun 18, 2004)

*More*

There is always some ugly bike.....


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## JSUN (Jun 22, 2004)

mr plow said:


> This one is just wrong!!!


Thats Brett Foes original downhill bike that he used to bomb down Mt. wilson trail in LA in the late 70's or 80's. Its the bike that led to the sickest FOES dh bikes we see now.


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## shiggy (Dec 19, 1998)

JSUN said:


> Thats Brett Foes original downhill bike that he used to bomb down Mt. wilson trail in LA in the late 70's or 80's. Its the bike that led to the sickest FOES dh bikes we see now.


Try mid '90s


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## yoonior (Jan 26, 2004)

*that's Austrian brand called HiTec *



AmateurBiker said:


> Another beauty from the same company:


I rode similiar model some years ago (Hitec SLK Freeride), back in 2000 it was really nice bike, adjustable travel (4/5/6"), adjustable geometry, Marzocchi Boss VR 50 shock, FSR style suspension.


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## Flyin' Fox (Feb 16, 2005)

**



mr plow said:


> I forgot to mention that this heap retails for over 3000 euros in Europe!
> How is this possible?? Thats a sh*tload of money!!!


Its Europe we are talking about here!

(just kidding)


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## flyingwalrus (Apr 14, 2004)

this is in response to stuff a while ago.....the Duncan Cock.....heh heh.....is a pretty sick bike, and that 's like the same philosophy Cove has......Handjob, stiffee, g-spot, etc. Also, these bikes are so f*cking ugly! Oh my god, I was laughing my @ss off! That POS is 3000 euro's? Just buy a Demo or something.


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## mike67 (Jan 13, 2004)

*Here's one*

one more for the list..........found it in the shock forum, no offense to the owner, but WTF


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## Tracerboy (Oct 13, 2002)

*I am somewhat embarrased....*



scabrider said:


> the ugliest bike is the honda dh bike, the second picture is pretty bad though.


to see not one but two NZ bikes in this post:

The Avanti in Via's post was a concept based on the the Keewee D8 which is still in production. Its 4130 cromo and is much like a giant dh comp in suspension. Bear in mind this is circa 1998

The second bike - a LAHAR (nasty volcanic mudslide) is a carbon frame with leaf spring chain stays, an internal Rolhoff hub. It is UGLY, but very quiet coming down the hill. Not quite sure whats happening with LAHAR bikes. The owner/engineer is somewhat of an eccentric character and the financial viability of the business always seems up in the air.

The photo is Randy Spangler checking one out while down here shooting drop in tv.


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## keewee (Jan 12, 2004)

sdtmtb said:


> The Avanti in Via's post was a concept based on the the Keewee D8 which is still in production. Its 4130 cromo and is much like a giant dh comp in suspension. Bear in mind this is circa 1998


Not quite! - The Avanti in via's post was a concept bike made for the 1999 Aussie bike show. Keewee had just started making Y2K DH bikes, and pitched a supply deal to Avanti. They accepted (Avanti D8 2000-2002) and they had three of those moto style bikes made for the show. The big carbon seat could come off and a normal seat could be put on. Keewee have finished supplying Avanti, and now sell the D8 as a Cromo8 - it is quite popular in the UK.


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## JBsoxB (May 18, 2004)

misctwo said:


> not too bad actually....it's trying way too hard to be MX though...
> 
> but this one....even the saddle looks like ASS


hey! dose mah rims!


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## Deweydude (Mar 7, 2004)

misctwo said:


> i would even go as far as to say that the norco is uglier than the HT whatever the fk it is.


*HEY HEY HEY* now wait a minute


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## j6105 (Apr 10, 2004)

shiggy said:


> I was waiting for that.
> 
> _"I can't see how those bars would be effective..."_
> Don't worry. Most people are wearing blinders.


and most people are actually jumping stuff higher than my car with normal bars hehehe

sorry, those bars just get me nowhere, but at least shiggy is a nice mod


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## Evil4bc (Apr 13, 2004)

*AHHHH Spangler !!*



sdtmtb said:


> to see not one but two NZ bikes in this post:
> 
> The second bike - a LAHAR (nasty volcanic mudslide) is a carbon frame with leaf spring chain stays, an internal Rolhoff hub. It is UGLY, but very quiet coming down the hill. Not quite sure whats happening with LAHAR bikes. The owner/engineer is somewhat of an eccentric character and the financial viability of the business always seems up in the air.
> 
> The photo is Randy Spangler checking one out while down here shooting drop in tv.


That's too funny I worked at a LBS with Randy Spangler for a while .
A guy from NZ came in one day with a Lahar and yes their are ugly but designed more as a as purpose trail bike them a full on DH bike , they also weigh like 50 lbs .
The suspension had to be the most plush and perpectly damped feeling bike I ever rode.
The really weird thing was the bike I rode had a rock shox super delux rear shox and the damping felt better than my Yeti with a custom Romic at the time , I have a feeling the leaf spring and low levrage ratio help that bike a lot .
I say Lahar ugly but cool !


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## thebikedoctor33 (Apr 4, 2004)

zedro said:


> yeah people fixate on a generic item and base entire comparisons off them, it irks me some. If you're gonna compare monocoques, compare them on their own merit, not simply because they are both basic monocoque layouts (especially if one is horrendously executed with sharp corners and zero flow). Thats all i'm getting at.


stupid question, wuts a monocoque????


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## bikescars101 (Jan 13, 2005)

A monocoque is usually a single piece front frame, usually has a lot more metal and definitely more surface area than most bikes. AKA: Intense, Norco (probably most widely known for their "monocoque" design, and Foes. Just to name a few. Also, there's this kick ass European Company, HT, they make awesome monocoque frames.


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## flatulentfox (Aug 27, 2004)

thebikedoctor33 said:


> stupid question, wuts a monocoque????


A metal structure, such as an aircraft, in which the skin absorbs all or most of the stresses to which the body is subjected.


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## Shepherd Wong (Apr 24, 2005)




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## Tracerboy (Oct 13, 2002)

Evil4bc said:


> That's too funny I worked at a LBS with Randy Spangler for a while .
> A guy from NZ came in one day with a Lahar and yes their are ugly but designed more as a as purpose trail bike them a full on DH bike , they also weigh like 50 lbs .
> The suspension had to be the most plush and perpectly damped feeling bike I ever rode.
> The really weird thing was the bike I rode had a rock shox super delux rear shox and the damping felt better than my Yeti with a custom Romic at the time , I have a feeling the leaf spring and low levrage ratio help that bike a lot .
> I say Lahar ugly but cool !


Uhhh, I dont think it was ever designed to be a trail bike, just look at the angles... That said Lahar does build a one peice carbon frame with the chainstay flexing create an axle path, it had like 3 inches of travel. The DH bike was designed with the Rock Shox a long time ago and for whatever reason the shock was never up graded. I have no idea how well they pedal but you're right about plushness.


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## Skygrounder (Apr 26, 2004)

Weird, yes. Ugly no. Single purpose exercises in engineering are always going to look odd.


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## hardcore newbie (Nov 6, 2004)

this thread has put me into tears


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## MicroHuck (Jan 31, 2005)

Skygrounder said:


> Weird, yes. Ugly no. Single purpose exercises in engineering are always going to look odd.


WOWSERS! That must be designed to pedal 400 mph!!! 90tooth ring to 11 tooth rear?

Was that bike designed for high speed DH road biking?


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## firevsh2o (Jan 31, 2004)

When such a HT comes around the corner I feel sorry for beeing Austrian.  

But nobody I know buys it here either. There are only some sponsored riders I guess - and they can't win!!!

Greetings from Graz/Austria


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