# My trek 800 bike



## kimbruess (Nov 4, 2011)

My trek 800 mountain bike 
I bought cheap off ebay 
It has rust on the chain and i thought i'd have to get new chain but to my surprise the chain still works.All I have to do is clean the rust off the chain and brakes parts.
it is a 21 speed bike.It is steel cr moly frame.
Can't find the brand name on the v brakes but it works good.The v brakes are powerful and provide instant stopping power.You need to adjust them properly.
The shimano ef gears all change fine and surprisingly there is no rust on the rear wheel cassette..

this bike rides well and is suited to my height of 5 feet 6 inches. It is small framed bike

I've got another trek 800 which i will be posting pictures of soon.Stay tuned!!


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## BeginnerCycling (Nov 21, 2011)

I like these old Treks -- they seem to last forever.


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## kimbruess (Nov 4, 2011)

*My trek 800 mountain bike more pictures*

My trek 800 mountain bike more pictures
I look to at mountain bike pictures.Lots of them from every angle.Not just a few.
It has suntour cranks.


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## colker1 (Jan 6, 2004)

Did you buy it from Rumpfy?


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## Fred Smedley (Feb 28, 2006)

colker1 said:


> Did you buy it from Rumpfy?


It was too big for Rumpy.


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## Rumpfy (Dec 21, 2003)

You've gotta be fcuking kidding me.


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## eastcoaststeve (Sep 19, 2007)

Rumpfy said:


> You've gotta be fcuking kidding me.


E, wish I could have seen the look on your face when you scrolled through those pics,

must have been priceless. 

Steve


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## longfinkillie (Jan 28, 2011)

At least it doesn't have slicks _and_ no cross-chaining.


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## MendonCycleSmith (Feb 10, 2005)

Your metal siding needs some help. The bike? Enjoy.


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## Fillet-brazed (Jan 13, 2004)

Seat is not period correct. How is the vertical compliance with the monostay?

I think Rumpfy has an NOS bar, stem and shifters that go to that bike. Been hoarded away for years.


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## colker1 (Jan 6, 2004)

Fillet-brazed said:


> Seat is not period correct. How is the vertical compliance with the monostay?
> 
> I think Rumpfy has an NOS bar, stem and shifters that go to that bike. Been hoarded away for years.


.. from that dream build 800 he was putting together? Flame all you want but i think those Trek 800 are overrated.


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## Deuce Bigelow (Jun 9, 2010)

Why did you go and steal a bike from a homeless person? Not cool.


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## Linoleum (Aug 25, 2008)

No where in your rambling incoherent post did you photograph anything that could be considered a VRC bicycle. We are all dumber for having viewed it. I award you no points and may God have mercy on your soul.


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## yo-Nate-y (Mar 5, 2009)

Don't repaint!!


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## Xizang11 (Feb 3, 2008)

But this one has Suntour cranks!!!!!


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## da'HOOV (Jan 3, 2009)

more wasted bandwidth here than all of my posts combined


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## lancsben (Dec 6, 2011)

Are you planning to restore this? It sounds almost as if you are going to ride it like it is!

Then again I am new here


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## Rumpfy (Dec 21, 2003)

I'm sorry but every reply in this thread has me laughing out loud. Hahaha! :lol:


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## fishcreek (Apr 10, 2007)

just curious, how much did you pay for this?


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## kimbruess (Nov 4, 2011)

*reply*



fishcreek said:


> just curious, how much did you pay for this?


I paid $30 for it.
The rust on it made it cheap for me.
The only thing i had to do to get it operational was to adjust the v brakes at the back because one side arm wasn't swinging back.The rust in the chain i decided to use a scourer to wipe the rust off.
Does anyone know any chemicals or a good way to get rid of the rust on the bike?
I'm very impessed in how it rides.It runs good.I got a fantastic bargain don't you think?
the rear derailuer is straight and not bent and it changes gear smoothly.


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## MendonCycleSmith (Feb 10, 2005)

kimbruess said:


> I paid $30 for it.
> The rust on it made it cheap for me.
> The only thing i had to do to get it operational was to adjust the v brakes at the back because one side arm wasn't swinging back.The rust in the chain i decided to use a scourer to wipe the rust off.
> Does anyone know any chemicals or a good way to get rid of the rust on the bike?
> ...


Thanks for rolling with the punches. You're new, no idea how long you've lurked though, but this forum is dedicated to classic, old MTB's generally at the higher end of the markets scale, though there's a few cheaper ones that get us all misty eyed. Thing is, all are, for the great bulk of them at least, pre 1990's. One off's, low production counts, hand built by one person or one small crew, that sort of thing.

No offense, but you have a great piece of transportation there, if it gets you from point A to point B whether it's road or path, and you like it, awesome. But it gets no love here from the masses. No rules say you can't post, but know that if you persist, you will end up with all manner of (rather humorous) yet negative attention paid to you.

If you enjoy a good flogging (a guy named Kyle comes to mind from BITD) welcome aboard, lets see some pics of your rusty Specialized Hot Rock next, or perhaps your Next or Magna. If you want other more genuine help with the bike, or a more appreciative audience, you might consider heading over to the beginners forum, or perhaps, the Trek forum.

As for the rest of you, thanks for being generally nice, and for a great laugh this AM


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## mechagouki (Nov 30, 2007)

"Into the valley of death, rode the 800...."


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## muddybuddy (Jan 31, 2007)

kimbruess said:


> Does anyone know any chemicals or a good way to get rid of the rust on the bike?


Gasoline

Followed by a match.


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## Fillet-brazed (Jan 13, 2004)

I always like those later V brake era 800s because that's when they got the Keith Bontrager influence. It's pretty much a Race Lite isn't it, but just made in Wisconsin?


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## girlonbike (Apr 24, 2008)

I think you should go to a shop and demo a real mountain bike and you'll see the difference then. I don't specifically think you got a good deal but you seem to enjoy your fleet of heavy rusty bikes so enjoy!


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## kimbruess (Nov 4, 2011)

*understand*

I can't understand why some people are knocking it just because It may not be the top of he range bike.
I can tell you it is a much better bike to ride than a Walmart or a Kmart or a Toys'R'Us department store bike(which a lot of people buy).
I'm an advocate of getting people to ride bikes as it is a healthy activity like sex.You don't have to spend thousands of dollars to get a good mountain bike and enjoy the mountain biking experience.After all not every one is as Rich as say Bill Gates or a Warren Buffett.
I have a norco nitro which is $1000 bike which has a marzocchi z1 bombers and full Simano deore LX set up and it is not a massive difference.
I also have a kona cindercone and a 1994 professional racing bike with Full Shimano Deore XT groupset set up and deore xt hubs and mavic rims and DT swiss spokes.It rides better but not a massive difference as higher more expensive bike would suggest. 
The law of diminishing returns sets in and it is the cost of the compents which makes the mountain bike expensive.
I also have a $2000 GT LTS dual suspension mountain bike.
Thanks everyone for the positive comments but I don't appreciate the negative ones.

I ride my cheaper bikes the most for normal every day use and ride my expensive bikes not that often as I've been a victim of bike theft a few times.


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## Fillet-brazed (Jan 13, 2004)

kimbruess said:


> I can't understand why some people are knocking it just because It may not be the top of he range bike.
> I can tell you it is a much better bike to ride than a Walmart or a Kmart or a Toys'R'Us department store bike.
> I'm an advocate of getting people to ride bikes as it is a healthy activity like sex.You don't have to spend thousands of dollars to get a good mountain bike and enjoy the mountain biking experience.After all not every none is as Rich as say Bill Gates or a Warren Buffett.
> I have a norco nitro which is $1000 bike which has a marzocchi z1 bombers and full Simano deore LX set up and it is not a massive difference.
> ...


Perhaps a Magna would be a good choice for the indiscriminate mtber. An excellent value and should feel very similar to the LTS except for maybe on the bigger drops:


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## Fred Smedley (Feb 28, 2006)

kimbruess said:


> I paid $30 for it.
> T
> Does anyone know any chemicals or a good way to get rid of the rust on the bike?
> I.


Oxalic acid 1 pound oxalic acid | eBay

Only use a .02% solution . do not use on aluminum, Nuetralize with baking soda after rinsing. Do a internet search on Oxalic A and rust to find procedures .C & V forum @ Bikeforums covers it really well do a search.


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## MendonCycleSmith (Feb 10, 2005)

I was simply trying to get you up to speed on the environment around here, not trying to say that all the bikes loved here are required to be $20,000 ultra rare garage queens. Try looking around a bit, you'll get the gist.....

Your older bikes (Kona and XT equipped whatever) would elicit more interest, to be quite honest.

Basically, your 800 is a McDonalds Happy meal bike. Sure it fills the belly, but it has about as much soul as, well, a Yugo. 

I don't think mass produced mass marketed bikes really excite many, but here in particular.

That you're riding bikes, and loving it? All good there. You have an excellent coffee/beer getter.


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## Xizang11 (Feb 3, 2008)

@ $30 I don't think you did poorly. You should be able to clean that up and flip it and net $20-$30. You can even feel pretty good about keeping some poor sap off a Magna. Personally, I would clean up the drivetrain and leave the rest rusty so I could use it as a reliable commuter that I didn't have to lock up.


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## colker1 (Jan 6, 2004)

Fillet-brazed said:


> Perhaps a Magna would be a good choice for the indiscriminate mtber. An excellent value and should feel very similar to the LTS except for maybe on the bigger drops:


 like sex.


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## StanleyButterfly (Nov 4, 2009)

kimbruess said:


> Thanks everyone for the positive comments but I don't appreciate the negative ones.


ha! poor baby. What did you expect posting junk?


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## Rumpfy (Dec 21, 2003)

kimbruess said:


> Thanks everyone for the positive comments but I don't appreciate the negative ones.


I don't appreciate people posting pictures of absolute piece of $h!t bikes. So we're even. 

Thats said, I think its great that you ride it and its up to your standards of acceptable. Just don't be upset when no one gets excited about a bike that can be found on every Craigslist, eBay, school bike rack, swap meet, and dumpster across the world. At the end of the day, its a low end rusty beat up Trek. Big whoop.


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## Fillet-brazed (Jan 13, 2004)

Rumpfy said:


> I don't appreciate people posting pictures of absolute piece of $h!t bikes. So we're even.
> 
> Thats said, I think its great that you ride it and its up to your standards of acceptable. Just don't be upset when no one gets excited about a bike that can be found on every Craigslist, eBay, school bike rack, swap meet, and dumpster across the world. At the end of the day, its a low end rusty beat up Trek. Big whoop.


all this time I thought the poster was just trying to stir us up with all the photos of this bike, but I think this is for real.


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## kimbruess (Nov 4, 2011)

*My trek 800 other mountain bike*

My trek 800 other mountain bike 
Its good to have cheaper budget mountain bikes alongside my expensive top notch bikes.i ride my cheap bikes the most as these are far less prone to bike theft.I live in an area where bike theft is rampant.
Trust me if a thief really wants your high class bike he will get it.The expensive bikes are one big advertisement for the thief.It stands out from the crowd.
For the expensive elite bikes Bike theft is a Huge Issue.The professional bike thiefs are far more likely to go for the elite bike than a rack full of cheapies.The people I know with the expensive bikes are too scared to park their bikes at common places where there is a lot of people passing through.
I'm getting a lot of enjoyment from riding these bikes and parking them anywhere without worrying all the time if its gonna get stolen if it were an elite high class bike.
I've had a few of my mountain bikes stolen..One of them was a top notch Giant Dual suspension.I can never forget that and it still hurts me to think and be reminded of it
This is the sort of bike you can take to shopping centres,the gym,the cinema,university or college and other places without worrying about having the most expensive bike getting stolen
.My expensive bikes I ride on special occasions only where I can keep an eye on it.

I also have a clever new way of locking the bike.Should I reveal that secret?I don't thinks its ever been done before.


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## ameybrook (Sep 9, 2006)

Lets see the "top notch" bikes


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## cousineddie (Oct 23, 2008)

kimbruess said:


> .
> 
> I also have a clever new way of locking the bike.Should I reveal that secret?I don't thinks its ever been done before.


Is there a top notch bike hiding under that tarp?


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## girlonbike (Apr 24, 2008)

kimbruess said:


> My trek 800 other mountain bike
> Its good to have cheaper budget mountain bikes alongside my expensive top notch bikes.


sure, that makes sense to have 1 junk bike you don't mind losing of these but you have posted...what....3 of these 30 dollar bikes so far? that just makes it seem like you're a junk collector.


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## cousineddie (Oct 23, 2008)

ameybrook said:


> Lets see the "top notch" bikes


But there could be thieves here who would steal the aforementioned top notch/high class bikes.


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## girlonbike (Apr 24, 2008)

OH CRAP. I count 4.


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## cousineddie (Oct 23, 2008)

girlonbike said:


> that just makes it seem like you're a junk collector.


What do you have against junk collectors?


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## girlonbike (Apr 24, 2008)

ha. nuthin. but if you're going to say you use this special theft proof bike to visit the finer parts of a seedy town, I don't see why you need like a half dozen of them.


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## muddybuddy (Jan 31, 2007)

I have a s**t bike too for making a run to the store, but I don't go around showing it off. In fact, when I list my bikes, I usually don't even include it.

Its a 91 GT Outpost if you must know.


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## Rumpfy (Dec 21, 2003)

muddybuddy said:


> Its a 91 GT Outpost if you must know.


I'm going to miss you GS.


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## girlonbike (Apr 24, 2008)

This could be a good hijack. A confession of your junk bike. I had a MB-3. Now I have a Curtlo CX. Carry on.


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## yo-Nate-y (Mar 5, 2009)

Hmm. If we mean what we ride around town and lock up, then my junk bike is a Steelman Eurocross. 

That's about as low as I'm going these days, as I sold off all my all-weather out-in-the-snow beaters.


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## Rumpfy (Dec 21, 2003)

I don't own shitty bikes. Its not my thing.


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## mechagouki (Nov 30, 2007)

I have a Superfly SS, 

and a Fuel EX.

Sorry....


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## muddybuddy (Jan 31, 2007)

Rumpfy said:


> I'm going to miss you GS.


In my defense I've had it since before I got into the vintage stuff, and the only reason I got it was to pull the kiddie trailer so my nice bikes wouldn't get screwed up. But if you must ban me, I understand.


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## 805MTB (Jul 4, 2010)

i've been looking for that original saddle to the Trek 800
heck it even has the lycra cover


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## RickD. (Apr 7, 2004)

I have a bastardized Trek 4500 as my beater. But its got an XTR headset on it so I can at least look at myself in the mirror in the morning.


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## kimbruess (Nov 4, 2011)

*good guy*



Fillet-brazed said:


> all this time I thought the poster was just trying to stir us up with all the photos of this bike, but I think this is for real.


Hey I'm the good guy.
I'm not The bad guy. The Real enemy is the Bike Thief. And there are plenty of them every where waiting and taking that opportunity to steal elite bikes.
I'm not an evil person.


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## kimbruess (Nov 4, 2011)

*new Fort Knox Bicycle security*

*hmmmmmm. should i post the new method of locking the bike?
I have a supercool new bike lock that will deter the typical bike thief and make it extremely hard for the professional bike thief to steal your bike.Its original and effective
I can't patent it to make money so I might as well reveal it here.
Who wants me to reveal it?
It would be like having Fort Knox Bicycle security. 
It would be a world first and exlusive here in the forums.
Bike theft is the Number one Issue when it comes to the top of the range mountain bikes.
You would worry and wonder if your elite bike is still there when you walk out the door of the shopping centre,etc.Every year thousands and thousands of mountain bikes get stolen.Thats a sure bet*.

hey hey I'm new to forums here.I'm learning.
Thanks again for the good comments and some good advice from the Moderator.(MendonCycleSmith).His advice is proving to be true.I'm taking note of his good advice.
I'm beginning to understand the mindset of some of these posters.


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## hollister (Sep 16, 2005)

did you really just take it there?


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## fishcreek (Apr 10, 2007)

do you really need to lock it?


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## jtmartino (Jul 31, 2008)

I'm not sure what's worse - the bikes or the grammar. I feel like I'm being punished with each new post from the op, but I just can't stop reading.


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## pinguwin (Aug 20, 2004)

Old Diamondback Ascent. Hey, it's in pretty good shape and was $25 on craigslist, no work needed. Good for riding to work in the winter. There, I 'fessed up and I feel better. I might even post a picture later.


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## jeff (Jan 13, 2004)

Beat to hell Ultra and some old cruisers.


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## hollister (Sep 16, 2005)

aww man, the OP edited out the insane rambling part? boo, hiss!


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## girlonbike (Apr 24, 2008)

I hate hate hate Hollister! Die in a fire!


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## hollister (Sep 16, 2005)

girlonbike said:


> which is why the quote feature is nice sometimes.


your advice is proving to be true. I'm taking note of this good advice


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## girlonbike (Apr 24, 2008)

hollister said:


> your advice is proving to be true. I'm taking note of this good advice


mwah haaa haaaa! :thumbsup:


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## hollister (Sep 16, 2005)

that's cold blooded


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## kimbruess (Nov 4, 2011)

*here's one of my top notch elite bikes*



ameybrook said:


> Lets see the "top notch" bikes


*Here's one of my top notch elite bikes*

2005 Trek Fuel Ex8
Sizes 19.5
Frame ZR 9000
Front Suspension: *RockShox Reba Race* w/Motion Control, 100mm
Rear Shock: RockShox MC 3R, handlebar remote, 100mm
Wheels
Wheels Bontrager Race Disc tubeless with Bontranger Hub(front) 
DT Swiss 5.1D with Shimano Deore XT Hub(Rear)(better than original rear wheel which it came with)

Drivetrain
Shifters Shimano Deore LX ST-M585 Hydraulic Brake Shifters 
Front Derailleur Shimano Deore LX
Rear Derailleur Shimano Deore XT
Crank Shimano LX 44/32/22
Cassette SRAM 970 11-34, 9 speed

Components

Seat Post Bontrager Race
Handlebars Bontrager Race, 31.8, 630x25
Stem Bontrager Race, 31.8
Headset Alloy aheadset, semi-cartridge, sealed
Brakeset Shimano Deore LX

*I've posted more pictures in the trek forum*


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## Fillet-brazed (Jan 13, 2004)

kimbruess said:


> here's one of my top notch elite bikes
> 2005 Trek Fuel Ex8
> Sizes 19.5
> Frame ZR 9000
> ...


That top notch bike just cries out "my owner is an serious rider".


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## utahdog2003 (Jul 8, 2004)

I know the thread is only two pages and it took less than 3 minutes to read, but I still have a painful ache in my soul where those precious minutes and their untapped virgin promise used to reside. Now all is wasted.

Kill me.














and no fair quoting "Untapped Virgin" and using it out of context.


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## BeginnerCycling (Nov 21, 2011)

utahdog2003 said:


> I know ... I['m] still ... an[] ... untapped virgin ... Kill me.
> 
> and [sic] fair quoting "Untapped Virgin" and using it out of context.


Sorry for your frustration, perhaps a Trek 800 would help?


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## girlonbike (Apr 24, 2008)

nice cabling effort.


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## rudymexico (Aug 14, 2010)

Nice...
Full susser with slicks...


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## BStrummin (Nov 17, 2009)

Wow. I thought we were just being messed with, but slicks? Really?


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## Rumpfy (Dec 21, 2003)

Fillet-brazed said:


> That top notch bike just cries out "my owner is an serious rider".


Top notch elite bikes often do.


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## jtmartino (Jul 31, 2008)

rumpfy said:


> top notch elite bikes often do.


red font = serious.


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## Rumpfy (Dec 21, 2003)

jtmartino said:


> red font = serious.


Fcukin' A right it is.


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## Fillet-brazed (Jan 13, 2004)

Rumpfy said:


> Fcukin' A right it is.


Deore LX = Top Notch Elite
Acera = Elite
Alivio = ?


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## utahdog2003 (Jul 8, 2004)

BeginnerCycling said:


> Sorry for your frustration, perhaps a Trek 800 would help?


Only if you can swing it hard enough to kill me with it.



Fillet-brazed said:


> Deore LX = Top Notch Elite
> Acera = Elite
> Alivio = ?


Alivio = Gnar. Duh!


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## girlonbike (Apr 24, 2008)

I like your new badge, chucklehead.


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## Rumpfy (Dec 21, 2003)

Fillet-brazed said:


> Deore LX = Top Notch Elite
> Acera = Elite
> Alivio = ?


Alivio = Elite
Acera = Notch Elite
LX = Top Notch Elite
XT = Super Top Notch Elite
XTR = Super Mega Top Notch Elite

You can quote Mr. Shimano on that!


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## jtmartino (Jul 31, 2008)

I'm LOLing so hard right now.


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## yo-Nate-y (Mar 5, 2009)

Rumpfy said:


> You can quote Mr. Shimano on that!


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## cousineddie (Oct 23, 2008)

kimbruess said:


> *Here's one of my top notch elite bikes*
> 
> *I've posted more pictures in the trek forum*


Nice bike - but with the slicks, it looks like Justin Tuck wearing ballet shoes.


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## utahdog2003 (Jul 8, 2004)

There are pictures of Justin Tuck in ballet shoes over in the Trek forum? Man this place is going to hell in a hand basket.


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## cousineddie (Oct 23, 2008)

DexterMustard said:


> Wow. I thought we were just being messed with, but slicks? Really?


Yeah, and it's not even a Klein.


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## cousineddie (Oct 23, 2008)

utahdog2003 said:


> There are pictures of Justin Tuck in ballet shoes over in the Trek forum? Man this place is going to hell in a hand basket.


Anything goes in the Trek forum.


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## fishcreek (Apr 10, 2007)




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## MendonCycleSmith (Feb 10, 2005)

cousineddie said:


> Yeah, and it's not even a Klein.


Aren't Trek and Klein interchangeable?


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## Xizang11 (Feb 3, 2008)

This thread makes me want...no, _NEED a super mega top notch elite trek 800 with slicks....._


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## longfinkillie (Jan 28, 2011)

MendonCycleSmith said:


> Aren't Trek and Klein interchangeable?


They sure are! Look at the welds!


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## Secace (Sep 8, 2004)

MendonCycleSmith said:


> Basically, your 800 is a McDonalds Happy meal bike. Sure it fills the belly, but it has about as much soul as, well, a Yugo.


That made me just plop my chicken nuggets.


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## utahdog2003 (Jul 8, 2004)

Don't hate on Yugo's. The little buggers are based on earlier Fiats and with modifications can be a hoot to drive. Can't say the same about a Trek 800, unless your idea of modifications includes a smelter furnace.


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## datasurfer (Nov 24, 2006)

I can't believe that I overlooked this thread until today. I have nothing of substance to add. Pass the popcorn please...


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## esundell90 (Dec 20, 2009)

Hey, I own an 800, its not something I ride on trails really tho. It's almost downright scarry to do so.

Mine is jokeingly called the "Mom-bike"









However, while I have much nicer bikes, this is the bike that gets the most seat time. It's my commuter/tourer


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## sasquatch rides a SS (Dec 27, 2010)

I think my super top notch stumpy fsr ate an 850 and **** out an 800 last week. I found it leaning against my garage after work...


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## Xizang11 (Feb 3, 2008)

SuperTopNotch4Life! I'm sooo changing my screen name.....


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## Linoleum (Aug 25, 2008)

Dear god show us whatś under the tarp!


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## tductape (Mar 31, 2008)

esundell90 said:


> Hey, I own an 800, its not something I ride on trails really tho. It's almost downright scarry to do so.
> 
> Mine is jokeingly called the "Mom-bike"
> 
> ...


That would explain why it is in the kitchen.....


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## esundell90 (Dec 20, 2009)

lol yep


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## jeff (Jan 13, 2004)

How many micro waves does one guy need?



esundell90 said:


> Hey, I own an 800, its not something I ride on trails really tho. It's almost downright scarry to do so.
> 
> Mine is jokeingly called the "Mom-bike"
> 
> ...


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## Uncle Grumpy (Oct 20, 2005)

Xizang11 said:


> This thread makes me want...no, _NEED a super mega top notch elite trek 800 with slicks....._


_

I hear ya. That blue and black one - pure bike porn right there. But gee, only 10 photos of it? I need at least 12 because the bike is Super Mega Top Notch Elite to the power of Awesome.

Grumps_


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## Uncle Grumpy (Oct 20, 2005)

kimbruess said:


> *hmmmmmm. should i post the new method of locking the bike?
> I have a supercool new bike lock that will deter the typical bike thief and make it extremely hard for the professional bike thief to steal your bike.Its original and effective
> I can't patent it to make money so I might as well reveal it here.
> Who wants me to reveal it?*


*

YES! Please, please just reveal it.

I bet it's a super mega awesome top notch top shelf banzai gold plated award winning honey roasted single malt ass kicking Chuck Norris elite racing spec jazz fusion blue ray stable platform self cleaning baby kissing hand shaking dog walking mother lovingly excellent bike lock that makes Fort Knox look like a $2 padlock.

And hell, I really am digging your sense of humour. So, bring forth the greatest bike lock in the world.

Please.

Grumps*


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## Uncle Grumpy (Oct 20, 2005)

Hmmm, just noticed. All the OPs bikes have right-front braking. He might be Australian, or from the UK.

I'm from Australia.

If he is from Australia, let me apologise on his behalf and just state, for the record, that we're not all like that. Some of us can string together a sentence.

Uncle Barnabas Q Grumpy


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## sasquatch rides a SS (Dec 27, 2010)

jeff said:


> How many micro waves does one guy need?


7.

He has the rest outside of the photo


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## esundell90 (Dec 20, 2009)

jeff said:


> How many micro waves does one guy need?


one is a toaster oven, not a microwave. Only need and have 1:thumbsup:


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## chefmiguel (Dec 22, 2007)

If Australian I will venture a guess that the security system has something to do with a salt water croc that has a great white shark glued on its back.


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## Uncle Grumpy (Oct 20, 2005)

chefmiguel said:


> If Australian I will venture a guess that the security system has something to do with a salt water croc that has a great white shark glued on its back.


That would be the top notch option.

The top notch elite racing pack option would be to have a croc with shark and then a funnel web spider glued to the shark.

Where has the OP gone? I was digging his stuff. He's funny.

Grumps


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## kimbruess (Nov 4, 2011)

Here's another of my top bikes Specialized StumpJumper FSR-XC, next to the old trek 800.
I like to buy good bikes cheap.I like bargains.
The Specialized StumpJumper FSR-XC has deore Lx Shifters and Deore XT rear derauillier.
It is very light bike at 12kgs and has Fox Float Rear Air Shock .


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## Uncle Grumpy (Oct 20, 2005)

Dang! You got lock on grips, clip in pedals... lucky! You ever take it off any sweet jumps? 

I like the way that 3 out of 5 photos are basically the same shot. But it's cool because I think I've seen enough.

Do you like Quake?

Grumps


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## girlonbike (Apr 24, 2008)

Uncle Grumpy said:


> I like the way that 3 out of 5 photos are basically the same shot. But it's cool because I think I've seen enough.


The last shot also summarizes nicely.


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## Xizang11 (Feb 3, 2008)

This is my favorite thread ever. ever. ever.


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## kimbruess (Nov 4, 2011)

Uncle Grumpy said:


> Dang! You got lock on grips, clip in pedals... lucky! You ever take it off any sweet jumps?
> 
> Do you like Quake?
> 
> Grumps


I don't take it for Jumps.I'm careful about my good bikes as i don't like to abuse them.This can damage the front forks as well cracking or even breaking the frame.
I ride mainly on the road with the Stumpjumper although it does have a funny suggestive name.


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## Uncle Grumpy (Oct 20, 2005)

Nah, you'll be right. Those Stumpies were a ripper in their day and it's a tried and true suspension design. That one looks pretty clean as well. By far your best bike so far but that ain't a monumental effort.

Dude, straight up, you don't need to do jumps to impress me. Your sense of humour is enough, I finally get it. You've brightened my day. I look forward to the next top notch bike.

Still waiting for the top notch fort knox bike security reveal though!

Grumps


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## cegrover (Oct 17, 2004)

I'm glad this thread is still alive. Also, I'm pleased that the OP has now made a reference to the metric system.


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## skoda (Sep 27, 2010)

Love this amusing thread, however I suspect someone is jerking our chains!!!


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## mavvy911 (Mar 16, 2012)

Came in here hoping that there was some love for the old cheap Treks, not so sure about that any more


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## Uncle Grumpy (Oct 20, 2005)

Plenty of love for cheap old Treks here.

When they're described properly as entry level bikes or a budget model we can appreciate their place in the world as a bike that got a lot of people hooked on riding. Let's be honest, they are what they are and nobody in their right mind should try to suggest they are anything else.

Which leads me to my next point.

When they're described as top notch etc etc, you're gonna look like a galoot.

If you have one, by all means post it up.

Grumps


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## mavvy911 (Mar 16, 2012)

Ahh.. that's exactly what my 800 did was get me hooked on riding. Just dug it out of my parents shed. It's a '92 and looks like the frame has held up ok (to me anyways)


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## mavvy911 (Mar 16, 2012)

'92 Trek Antelope, hadn't been ridden in about 3 or so years, hauled it out of the shed on saturday, put new tires on it, and it still works. Needs some TLC


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## Drummerboy1975 (Nov 24, 2011)

So of the two super sweet bikes you have there, which one see's more "saddle time"?


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## sasquatch rides a SS (Dec 27, 2010)

:lol:


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