# Any single riders?



## Trail Thumper (Jan 28, 2004)

Any single female riders around the age of 30 (give or take a couple years) up in here? Looking for some one to ride with in Orange County CA.


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## dirtcrab (Feb 4, 2004)

Trail Thumper said:


> Any single female riders around the age of 30 (give or take a couple years) up in here? Looking for some one to ride with in Orange County CA.


I hear there are some ladies in the Clydesdale forum.  Perhaps you'll have better luck over there.

In this forum, you have to come in with a minimum offer of a a new road bike, new mountain bike, small rock, and an offer of marriage to spawn the slightest amount of interest.


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## MallieD (Apr 11, 2004)

I think cattle and grazing land were also part of the "bride" package weren't they?


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## verslowrdr (Mar 22, 2004)

dirtcrab said:


> I hear there are some ladies in the Clydesdale forum.  Perhaps you'll have better luck over there.


Uh... speaking as a ClydeGirl here, don't count on it.


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## DirtGirl (Jan 12, 2004)

dirtcrab said:


> In this forum, you have to come in with a minimum offer of a a new road bike, new mountain bike, small rock, and an offer of marriage to spawn the slightest amount of interest.


Well---it is Orange county. If you believe everything you see on TV , 2 new bikes and a rock should be no problem----but you did forget to mention a singlespeed on top of a new road bike and one new mountain bike....a downhill bike may be nice too!


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## Trail Thumper (Jan 28, 2004)

*Ho Hum*

I dunno, Is there such a thing as an attractive female bike rider? Obviously not one in my area, lol. I guess my quest for famale riding companionship is over. Most women around here, if, "IF" they get off their fat lazy OC asses will attempt a road bike around the neighborhood. Guess it's too much to ask a woman to get on a MTB.


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## donkey (Jan 14, 2004)

*Yeah....*

....that attitude is going to get you a LONG way.

For the record, I ride with in OC with quite a few girls that are absolutely gorgeous, and they could probably take you on the ups and the downs.

I bet if you ride around the parking lot at el moro or any of the other local parks and spout off like you did here you might have some luck. Girls love that type of stuff!

Good Luck



Trail Thumper said:


> I dunno, Is there such a thing as an attractive female bike rider? Obviously not one in my area, lol. I guess my quest for famale riding companionship is over. Most women around here, if, "IF" they get off their fat lazy OC asses will attempt a road bike around the neighborhood. Guess it's too much to ask a woman to get on a MTB.


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## Christine (Feb 11, 2004)

Every girl on a bike is gorgeous. True for every guy as well. Except when they make sexist remarks. Tsk tsk.

I happen to be a single, 30-something mtb addict. When I'm out and about on my bike, you can bet that I'm not looking anything but sweaty and dirty. Sure, it's nice running into like-minded male riders, but I'm never in the dating mindset while riding. If anything, a good bike ride helps me to get my mind off stuff like work, family, and guys I've suffered.


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## Spike (Dec 30, 2003)

*Excellent idea!!*

Post some pictures of yourself, OC ass included, and bike too of course. We'll get back to you.



Trail Thumper said:


> I dunno, Is there such a thing as an attractive female bike rider? Obviously not one in my area, lol. I guess my quest for famale riding companionship is over. Most women around here, if, "IF" they get off their fat lazy OC asses will attempt a road bike around the neighborhood. Guess it's too much to ask a woman to get on a MTB.


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## Trail Thumper (Jan 28, 2004)

> Sure, it's nice running into like-minded male riders, but I'm never in the dating mindset while riding


I'm just looking for someone that wan'ts to go out and get dirty with me. Hard to find Female with similar interests.

Maybe I'll give that El moro thing a shot.


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## screampint (Dec 10, 2001)

> Is there such a thing as an attractive female bike rider?


Naw, as soon as I got a mountain bike I turned into a toadface cow! Before I was so attractive.... Oh well, at least my bike loves me.


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## SueB (Mar 16, 2004)

Is there such a thing as an attractive female bike rider? 

No. The requirements are to be FUGLY. I was attractive until I took up MTB and, oh well.....


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## catzilla (Jan 31, 2004)

I thought I was alone with my helmet induced unibrow. The doctor said that those rough trails would cause spastic colon, but I just wouldn't listen. 

Now, it's just me, my bikes, and my 48 cats.


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## gofarther (Mar 2, 2004)

catzilla said:


> I thought I was alone with my helmet induced unibrow. The doctor said that those rough trails would cause spastic colon, but I just wouldn't listen.
> 
> Now, it's just me, my bikes, and my 48 cats.


LMAO. Consider yourself flamed thump-daddy:


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## Impy (Jan 6, 2004)

Good looking MTB girls can sense dating desperation up to 300 yards down the trail and immediately hide in the bushes until the threat passes.


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## AZtortoise (Jan 12, 2004)

i am married and old so pickups on the trail usually do not happen. i talk to a lot of male(and female) riders at the trailhead and at rest stops(top of hills)on the trails. i rather enjoy that aspect of mtb'ing since i usually ride alone.

however, on a couple occasions guys have tried to pick me up and i felt EXTREMELY uncomfortable, to the point where my ride ended because of it. the last thing i want to do on a ride, or in the parking lot, is to be picked up on by a complete stranger.

i also do not care for the men that have come to this forum trying to pickup on us. now when guys come here and post, i think that is fine. and if a single woman gets attracted to one of the fellas that is fine. but to just come here out of the blue 'looking for a date,' i find it somewhat offensive. and then, when the @sshole insults us, well, it p!sses me off.

so blow away, trailthumper.

Rita


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## Trail Thumper (Jan 28, 2004)

*What???*



> i also do not care for the men that have come to this forum trying to pickup on us. now when guys come here and post, i think that is fine. and if a single woman gets attracted to one of the fellas that is fine. but to just come here out of the blue 'looking for a date,' i find it somewhat offensive. and then, when the @sshole insults us, well, it p!sses me off.
> 
> so blow away, trailthumper.


For one, I was not looking to "pick up" anyone. I was merely wondering if their is any females in my area that ride. I don't pick up on women on the trails either. That is why I came here and ASKED if their was any that would like to go on a ride. I am just trying to find somone with similar intrests as me.
#2. I didn't insult anyone. If you have no sense of humor ... you can blow off. I'm glad you think you know me so well. For you to call me an @sshole is out of line. You are an arrogant beeyatch! So you can ... "blow me"!


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## Impy (Jan 6, 2004)

Trail Thumper said:


> For one, I was not looking to "pick up" anyone. I was merely wondering if their is any females in my area that ride. I don't pick up on women on the trails either. That is why I came here and ASKED if their was any that would like to go on a ride. I am just trying to find somone with similar intrests as me.
> #2. I didn't insult anyone. If you have no sense of humor ... you can blow off. I'm glad you think you know me so well. For you to call me an @sshole is out of line. You are an arrogant beeyatch! So you can ... "blow me"!


How rude.

Go away little boy. You aren't welcome here.


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## Trail Thumper (Jan 28, 2004)

*Typical*

I haven't been rude to one person here except fo that bimbo that called me an @sshole. All you girls can stick together for all I care. No wonder I haven't met a nice girl on a bike. Your all stuck up.
Your ALL either a bunch of cows or a bunch of dumb bitCChes that made your hubby pay for your bike so you can go out and ride, while he earns the money for you.
YOU women are the ones that turned this post into an ugly one I might ad. All I did is ask a simple question.
Why did you turn a fun post into something so neggative?  Think about it for a minute ... all I did was ask a question and now you all hate me???
You guys have some real emotional problems.


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## richde (Jun 8, 2004)

*Only because this showed up in "latest posts"*



Trail Thumper said:


> I haven't been rude to one person here except fo that bimbo that called me an @sshole. All you girls can stick together for all I care. No wonder I haven't met a nice girl on a bike. Your all stuck up.
> Your ALL either a bunch of cows or a bunch of dumb bitCChes that made your hubby pay for your bike so you can go out and ride, while he earns the money for you.
> YOU women are the ones that turned this post into an ugly one I might ad. All I did is ask a simple question.
> Why did you turn a fun post into something so neggative?  Think about it for a minute ... all I did was ask a question and now you all hate me???
> You guys have some real emotional problems.


Dude, you screwed up by adding "single," and then "attractive" to your request for a "riding companion."

Rule # whatever, don't hit on women when they don't feel "attractive" or not at their best in other words, that includes the gym, riding, or wherever it seems appropriate.

Rich


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## gofarther (Mar 2, 2004)

Trail Thumper said:


> I haven't been rude to one person here except fo that bimbo that called me an @sshole. All you girls can stick together for all I care. No wonder I haven't met a nice girl on a bike. Your all stuck up.
> Your ALL either a bunch of cows or a bunch of dumb bitCChes that made your hubby pay for your bike so you can go out and ride, while he earns the money for you.
> YOU women are the ones that turned this post into an ugly one I might ad. All I did is ask a simple question.
> Why did you turn a fun post into something so neggative?  Think about it for a minute ... all I did was ask a question and now you all hate me???
> You guys have some real emotional problems.


For the love of everything good - please learn how to spell.

Cows & dumb b!tches? - Congrats pal, you just made the ignore list of every woman here.

You da man.

GF


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## scrublover (Dec 30, 2003)

*lurker spaz mode off*

Wow. I'm digging the irony (in your above post) in your use of dumb in describing the ladies here.........

Stupid is as stupid does indeed. Or is that the other way around? 

Either way, if you act the way you have here in your daily life......well.....
it's no surprise that you aren't having any luck with the ladies. 

*lurker spaz mode on*


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## catzilla (Jan 31, 2004)

Trail Thumper said:


> I haven't been rude to one person here except fo that bimbo that called me an @sshole. All you girls can stick together for all I care. No wonder I haven't met a nice girl on a bike. Your all stuck up.
> Your ALL either a bunch of cows or a bunch of dumb bitCChes that made your hubby pay for your bike so you can go out and ride, while he earns the money for you.
> YOU women are the ones that turned this post into an ugly one I might ad. All I did is ask a simple question.
> Why did you turn a fun post into something so neggative?  Think about it for a minute ... all I did was ask a question and now you all hate me???
> You guys have some real emotional problems.


Uh, I know you are but what am I?

No, no, wait. I got one.

You're mom's fat!

Hmmmm, still not right.

How 'bout <In a sing song voice> Neener, neener, neener. Maybe they don't date you because of your small weiner.

Don't worry super stud. You've got game, and don't let any hot MTB bombshell tell you otherwise! Keep dressing up as "Breast Inpector" every Halloween! 'Cause one of these years, it'll actually work, and you know it!


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## DirtGirl (Jan 12, 2004)

catzilla said:


> Uh, I know you are but what am I?


  This made my morning! Thankfully I did not have a mouthful of coffee!


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## jrm (Jan 12, 2004)

*Dude U R a Loser....*



Trail Thumper said:


> I haven't been rude to one person here except fo that bimbo that called me an @sshole. All you girls can stick together for all I care. No wonder I haven't met a nice girl on a bike. Your all stuck up.
> Your ALL either a bunch of cows or a bunch of dumb bitCChes that made your hubby pay for your bike so you can go out and ride, while he earns the money for you.
> YOU women are the ones that turned this post into an ugly one I might ad. All I did is ask a simple question.
> Why did you turn a fun post into something so neggative?  Think about it for a minute ... all I did was ask a question and now you all hate me???
> You guys have some real emotional problems.


And entertaining....


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## CarolinaGrl (Apr 9, 2004)

catzilla said:


> Don't worry super stud. You've got game, and don't let any hot MTB bombshell tell you otherwise! Keep dressing up as "Breast Inpector" every Halloween! 'Cause one of these years, it'll actually work, and you know it!


LOL! I've got to save this one for future use!

I guess Thumper forgot about his second post re: fat a$$s when he accused us of turning the thread negative.


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## Impy (Jan 6, 2004)

Trail Thumper said:


> YOU women are the ones that turned this post into an ugly one I might ad.[sic] All I did is ask a simple question.....
> 
> _I dunno, Is there such a thing as an attractive female bike rider? _


What a moron. You can't even keep track of your own insulting posts. Don't play victim here. If you can't see how insulting your line of questioning and posts are, don't expect to find a girlfriend. The MTB girl community is not that large, and I'd say you rapidly decrease your ability to find any dates in OC with every post you make.


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## Impy (Jan 6, 2004)

catzilla said:


> Don't worry super stud. You've got game, and don't let any hot MTB bombshell tell you otherwise! Keep dressing up as "Breast Inpector" every Halloween! 'Cause one of these years, it'll actually work, and you know it!


Catzilla, as usual, you rock


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## Sabine (Jan 12, 2004)

I can't believe I just found this post! I hate being late to a good party. Thats okay though because Impy's keeping the refreshments going and Catzilla already took care of the dip!

I'll put this up for the ladies. But I think we need a butt shot. Also a full body shot would be nice. I have a feeling you're hiding a dickiedo from us and if you are, well, you shouldn't really be calling anyone a cow now, should you?

Oh and here's a bonus link because I'm feeling for ya
http://www.fact-index.com/l/li/list_of_english_words_with_frequent_misuse.html

Silly Rabbit!

Sabine


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## gofarther (Mar 2, 2004)

Sabine said:


> Oh and here's a bonus link because I'm feeling for ya
> https://www.fact-index.com/l/li/list_of_english_words_with_frequent_misuse.html
> 
> Silly Rabbit!
> ...


Nice.

Uhh Thump, if you've had enough, you may want to scurry back to your


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## AZtortoise (Jan 12, 2004)

Trail Thumper said:


> For one, I was not looking to "pick up" anyone. I was merely wondering if their is any females in my area that ride. I don't pick up on women on the trails either. That is why I came here and ASKED if their was any that would like to go on a ride. I am just trying to find somone with similar intrests as me.
> #2. I didn't insult anyone. If you have no sense of humor ... you can blow off. I'm glad you think you know me so well. For you to call me an @sshole is out of line. You are an arrogant beeyatch! So you can ... "blow me"!


LOL, i do not 'blow' little boys that dont get their way. believe me, acting the way you do here will get you nowhere with most women. you MAY find one a little 'off' that does not mind verbal abuse. re-read your posts and you MAY see why i called you an @sshole. i call it the way i see it.

Rita


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## Christine (Feb 11, 2004)

*I believe you insulted ALL of us....*

......when you came into the Women's Lounge of a mountain bike forum and asked, "Is there such a thing as an attractive female bike rider? I guess my quest for female riding companionship is over."

You should re-phrase your question to read: "Any hot models in here willing to kill themselves trying to keep up with me on a bike and an empty stomach?

"Are you tall, thin, able to ride long distances without eating more than a model should? Can you avoid breaking bones without any fat to cushion your falls or calcium to fortify your skeleton?

"Can you ride without breaking your nails or having to wash that long, flowing hair every day? Think you can avoid getting scraped up, bruised, dirty, or sweaty?

"Think you can avoid bulking up your leg muscles in the process?

"'cause THAT would be unattractive."


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## Trail Thumper (Jan 28, 2004)

*Ummmm*

LOL, all I did is ask is "IF THERE WAS ANY FEMALE RIDERS IN OC"! I don't play victim anywhere! You girls insulted me first. I'll give ya some credit for being a little hard core but, SHYT C'mon already. Everybody should be here to have fun! I don't regret one single post and could care less about what you heartless *****es think.
Glad someone found a PIC of me. NOW, lets see what YOU girls look like!!! You all talk like your the **** but, I ain't seen anything!


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## Trail Thumper (Jan 28, 2004)

*That was funny!*



Christine said:


> ......when you came into the Women's Lounge of a mountain bike forum and asked, "Is there such a thing as an attractive female bike rider? I guess my quest for female riding companionship is over."
> 
> You should re-phrase your question to read: "Any hot models in here willing to kill themselves trying to keep up with me on a bike and an empty stomach?
> 
> ...


I like em dirty and grimey, sweaty too. lol. Broken nails and dirt in the hair is what I would like. I'm sick of these prissy lttle OC chicks saying they mountin bike.

Now Christine posted something for all of you to read. That was a good come back! Try it again girls. And, please post some pics if your so hot ... as you think you are.


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## The Berryman (Mar 19, 2004)

Freaking moron. Dont try to tell these gals what you meant in your orginal post. They know and have read your post more than you ever will. Do you really think that you are the first guy to come in here and post that kind of dribble? 

And now they are supposed to post their pics just so you can judge if they are "hot or not"?

For the record, some of them have posted their pics in the past. And although I never said it at the time, I can say many of them are very very nice looking. There was one that just floored me. Everytime I read the new posts added to the thread, I scrolled up to check out her picture again. But I never posted some lame response like "MAN YOU ARE HOT!". In fact I would never say any such thing like that to any of them in this forum. If that person wants a compliment from me, she needs to go post her picture on Passion or another forum. Thats not why this forum was created. This is more or less the last place you should be going to score a date.

You wandered into the ladies restroom dude. Your just a guest here. You need to check either your ego or your penis at the door.


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## gofarther (Mar 2, 2004)

Trail Thumper said:


> I like em dirty and grimey, sweaty too. lol. Broken nails and dirt in the hair is what I would like. I'm sick of these prissy lttle OC chicks saying they mountin bike.
> 
> Now Christine posted something for all of you to read. That was a good come back! Try it again girls. And, please post some pics if your so hot ... as you think you are.


Your = possessive. As in, "is that YOUR dog?"

You're = contraction of You Are. As in "YOU'RE hot."

Please note - despite your best efforts, these two terms are NOT interchangeable!

AAAAARRRGGGGGHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!


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## verslowrdr (Mar 22, 2004)

*OK, I'm game....*



Trail Thumper said:


> ...Try it again girls. And, please post some pics if your so hot ... as you think you are.


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## slowrnhell (Jun 15, 2004)

*What the hell is this?*

This little "Boy" is morally deranged and only to pity! He talks as he does to women and can't seem to understand why they don't seem to want any of his time. He will not solve this problem without counciling. ! lol Myself I am happily married to a lovely mountbiking girl....and I will tell you good luck in your hunt for a biking girl. But do yourself a favor and take care of that personality disorder first.


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## gofarther (Mar 2, 2004)

verslowrdr said:


>


Damn. Your hot.


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## namaSSte (Dec 19, 2003)

humorous and sad all at the same time. Dude, you're giving guys a bad name, sometimes it's best to stop digging once you've hit bedrock.


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## Sabine (Jan 12, 2004)

Trail Thumper said:


> LOL, all I did is ask is "IF THERE WAS ANY FEMALE RIDERS IN OC"! I don't play victim anywhere! You girls insulted me first. I'll give ya some credit for being a little hard core but, SHYT C'mon already. Everybody should be here to have fun! I don't regret one single post and could care less about what you heartless *****es think.Glad someone found a PIC of me. NOW, lets see what YOU girls look like!!! You all talk like your the **** but, I ain't seen anything!


Dickie Do,

Uh....is that all you did? Really? Well in that case you are right. We are all sorry humorless arrogant dumb stuck up ***** cows who have emotional problems and can't get off our fat lazy asses. How silly of us to think that was offensive.

And if you can't find pics of us, then your grasp of how to use the internet is only exceeded by your grasp of the english language. Speaking of which, did you even click on the helpful link I provided you? Silly Rabbit.

And, if you can't find pics, I'll help you out and let you know, we are all real and we are spectacular.

Sabine


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## Ridin'Dirty (Jun 4, 2004)

*I can't believe this ended in an arguement!*

HAHA! If this wasn't inevitable I don't know what is. Thank god all you honorable men are here to defend the girls from pigs like trail thumper....you must be really nice guys 

Trail Thumper posts an ad lookin' for some local ladies in his area to ride but then he ends up calling the girls cows and tells one to blow him. THAT IS SOME FUNNY $h!t!!! This guy definately wants to do very dirty things to all of you ladies....you don't even have to own a bike. He'll find one for you to ride.


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## Trail Thumper (Jan 28, 2004)

*Awww*

Don't hate me because I'm beautiful


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## Ridin'Dirty (Jun 4, 2004)

I don't hate you...I really do think the whole thing is funny and mildly entertaining.


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## The Berryman (Mar 19, 2004)

Sabine said:


> And, if you can't find pics, I'll help you out and let you know, we are all real and we are spectacular.


  Hah!

Sabines wit makes me laugh more than that of anybody else in this forum! And that is saying A LOT with this crowd. Thats why I (a guy) frequent this forum. I laugh more over here than anywhere else on MTBR.


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## Trail Thumper (Jan 28, 2004)

*HeHe*

I am glad to see that these women have a sense of humor now. I can't say that though because it would ruin the thread. 

I still HAVE NOT seen a picture of any of these women that claim to be so good looking. They sure like to talk but, can't produce ...


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## laotsu42 (Jan 5, 2004)

jsnk1975 said:


> HAHA! If this wasn't inevitable I don't know what is. Thank god all you honorable men are here to defend the girls from pigs like trail thumper....you must be really nice guys
> 
> Trail Thumper posts an ad lookin' for some local ladies in his area to ride but then he ends up calling the girls cows and tells one to blow him. THAT IS SOME FUNNY $h!t!!! This guy definately wants to do very dirty things to all of you ladies....you don't even have to own a bike. He'll find one for you to ride.


i've been dealing with grunting apes all my life ...and don't think they don't give guys **** too ..

they do

usually when in a group of guys with a few girls they will turn to me as soon as the girls have left the room and start making cracks about sexuality because i wasn't hitting on on the girls and usually because of this i end up acctually talking to them about all kinds of stuff (yes women have brains)

i also hear things like " what do you mean you're a pacifist, you don't like fighting ?!"

or even "you no like fooball ! you gay?"

but most of all i get sick of the after conversation ...when a girl leaves ...grunt grunt boobies grunt butt grunt ...me: gee she's pretty cute and really nice ...grunt you gay grunt

oh yeah and the constant judgement of faces and bodies like they are some how better looking ...

i've been an artist for ... well i started doing line drawings when i was 7 and i have seen all kinds of faces and bodies and still find myself wondering why guys think this girl isn't pretty and this one is ..

i personaly have found that barbie dolls are *****y and if you look into their eyes you can see it 
i cannot stand models and playboy models they all look so unobtainable and also so plastic and if you see them out of costume they look just like every one else ...
although it is fun to watch other guys fawn over some pushy Bi*** only to have her play games with them ...the reason i don't cotton to that in the first place ...

*whew*, sorry for the rant ...

but as an artist there are soo many different boddies and features that i seldome meet any women that i find unatractive they may not be perfect but what right do i have to hold that over them ...neither am i

i wouldn't even care if a girlfriend ever shaved or wore make up ... and still i remain single ... i gotta move to a less trendy town ...every one here is all dolled up and prissy even the guys ... 

any way i didn't jump to defend because it would appear that the ladies have him spitted and roasted quite well without my help ...allmost as funny as the the unnamable horror thats been going on in general discussion (ya know the one that just won't die) ...  i'm too nice anyway ... 

and for the record from one who's lurked on mtbr for a year the ladies here are very good looking and they bike too what more could you ask ...


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## The Berryman (Mar 19, 2004)

Word.

Guys like that kill me. After the ladies leave the group, they feel like they have to start making some sort of sexually explicit comments in order to reaffirm their hetrosexuality.

However, this very need of affirmation makes me question their hetrosexuality.

I am reminded of a party I attended back in the day. Some of the guys decided to pay for a stripper to come and dance for a friend who was leaving town. All the guys went into the living room and whooped and hollered, threw their hard earned money at the stripper. All the women left the living room hung out in the kitchen. I left the living room and followed the women into the kitchen.

Afterwards I heard the routine commments, "Whadya gay or somethin'? Ya barely sneaked a peak at da stripper!"

Gay?

Ummm...I was in the kitchen with all the women. Duh. By the time the stripper left I knew the name of every lady at the party and they all knew me. How gay is that?

And one other thing - when guys accuse other guys of being gay, why is it that those accused are supposed to care? I mean, they are guys. I care if women think I am gay. I could care less if guys thought I was gay.


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## The Berryman (Mar 19, 2004)

Trail Thumper said:


> I am glad to see that these women have a sense of humor now. I can't say that though because it would ruin the thread.
> 
> I still HAVE NOT seen a picture of any of these women that claim to be so good looking. They sure like to talk but, can't produce ...


Dude! You dont seriously think I hang out in the womens forum for the watered down margaritas and the crab dip, do you?

Sabine, Impy, CarolinaGirl, Catzilla, Christine and several of my other favorites that slip my mind are TOTALLY HOT! Just read their posts in this forum! They are funny, witty, insightful and they ride! Plus they have a totally different perspective on life and riding than the tiresome guys I usually hang around with. THATS HOT!


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## William Wallace (Jun 18, 2004)

*Ha ha ha ah ha!!*

Thanks Thumper and of course, ladies.

I must say this is one of the most funny threads I have read in a long time!

Thank you very much for brightening up my Friday afternoon. The weather has been very hot in London lately - but today it is bloody freezing in Knightsbridge! Therefore, what a wonderful way to lift my spirits.

One wonders if Thumper actually is extracting the urine here, or is actually REALLY that poor at:

a) The ENGLISH language
b) Discourse between the sexes
c) Using computers.

Incidentally, I searched for their pics, and I must say all the lovely ladies on here are rather stunning, and would give my wee kilt the horn... 'twould give a whole new meaning to the term "tossing the caber".. 

Sabine - mmm I wish there were more of you here in the UK!

Therefore if any female 'bored' members are ever over the pond, I would be honoured to show you some action in the Highlands and Islands of the UK. Cycling action of course.. 

Once again, a pleasure to read this! I am suffering the post Borneo MTB holiday blues  heres a pic of me there:


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## boxman12 (Jun 13, 2004)

The Berryman said:


> They are funny, witty, insightful and they ride! Plus they have a totally different perspective on life and riding than the tiresome guys I usually hang around with. THATS HOT!


My thoughts exactly! What more is there?


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## Sabine (Jan 12, 2004)

William Wallace said:


> Thanks Thumper and of course, ladies.
> 
> I must say this is one of the most funny threads I have read in a long time!
> 
> ...


Hmm.. I feel like I should knight you now or something. Your name and your lovely post are screaming for it. From hereforth (or is it henceforth?) you shall be Sir William Wallace the 3rd of Borneo.

I don't think Thump was pissing. I can usually spot a troll. But if that were a troll, it would have been a pointless one because the crafty women here did not overreact and so what would have been the point? Unless the point were to lift your spirits and tilt your kilt, and if that were so then this thread was a success. Hip hip, pass the dip.

Flattery will get you everywhere by the way. So right after we check out the St Louis trails with Berryman, we're gonna head over to jolly Ol England and see what Knightsbridge has to offer. Bring the monkey.

Sabine


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## Boj (Jan 13, 2004)

To Trail Thumper:

This is the correct way of going about getting some action. Subtle and smooth. Observe:



William Wallace said:


> Incidentally, I searched for their pics, and I must say all the lovely ladies on here are rather stunning, and would give my wee kilt the horn... 'twould give a whole new meaning to the term "tossing the caber"..
> 
> Sabine - mmm I wish there were more of you here in the UK!





The Berryman said:


> Sabine, Impy, CarolinaGirl, Catzilla, Christine and several of my other favorites that slip my mind are TOTALLY HOT! Just read their posts in this forum! They are funny, witty, insightful and they ride! Plus they have a totally different perspective on life and riding than the tiresome guys I usually hang around with. THATS HOT!


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## richde (Jun 8, 2004)

Sabine said:


> I can't believe I just found this post! I hate being late to a good party. Thats okay though because Impy's keeping the refreshments going and Catzilla already took care of the dip!
> 
> I'll put this up for the ladies. But I think we need a butt shot. Also a full body shot would be nice. I have a feeling you're hiding a dickiedo from us and if you are, well, you shouldn't really be calling anyone a cow now, should you?
> 
> ...


Nice tats, not! I wonder where he did time.

Rich


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## arsenic (Apr 8, 2004)

jsnk1975 said:


> HAHA! If this wasn't inevitable I don't know what is. Thank god all you honorable men are here to defend the girls from pigs like trail thumper....you must be really nice guys


clearly these ladies need no help "defending" themselves from this guy. this whole thread is just tff !


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## Lighty_ (Sep 16, 2003)

Trail Thumper said:


> I dunno, Is there such a thing as an attractive female bike rider?


I met one once.

I was going into a LBS to pick up my bike. While the employee was looking for the right invoice I saw this girl walking around the shop. Since I was waiting anyway I asked her if she was looking to buy a bike. She said actually she just started working at the store. She wasn't too familiar with road bikes so she was just familiarizing herself with them. She told me that she knows a lot about mountain bikes though, because she raced DH for Yeti. She told me she was from Santa Barbara, and used to surf before she got into MTB. She just moved from Bekerley and that was why she got a job at the shop. She told me how much fun 4cross looked and she wants to get into it. She had the most amazing blue eyes and sandy blond hair. She was as beautiful as a Yeti AS-X.

Then the guy found my invoice. I muttered a few polite pleasantries about how it was nice meeting her and I'll see her around, because I didn't have the cajones to ask her out. I thought it would have been creepy if I asked her out after only just meeting her. It would have totally made her uncomfortable. I didn't want to be the a$$hole customer hitting on her the first day of her job. Besides, she probably had a boyfriend.

I went back the next Sunday and didn't see her there. I tried to be nonchalant and ask about their "new employee." The guy said she wasn't working that day. The week after, one of my friends who worked the shop told me she quit to get a "real job."

And so I never saw her again. 

But my brakes worked really good after coming back from the shop.  That's life I guess.


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## Finch Platte (Nov 14, 2003)

*Here's a joke for this thread.*



Trail Thumper said:


> Any single female riders around the age of 30 (give or take a couple years) up in here? Looking for some one to ride with in Orange County CA.


TT was kind enough to post about this thread in another forum, so I had to take a look.

The Tax Office sends their auditor to a synagogue.
The auditor is doing all the checks and then turns to the rabbi and says, "I noticed that you buy a lot of candles."
"Yes" answered the Rabbi.
"Well, Rabbi, what do you do with the candle drippings?" he asked.
"A good question," noted the Rabbi. "We actually save them up and when we have enough, we send them back to the candle maker and every now and then, they send us a free box of candles."
"Oh," replied the auditor somewhat disappointed that his unusual question actually had a practical answer. So he thought he'd go on, in his obnoxious way.
"Rabbi, what about all these matzo purchases? What do you do with the crumbs from the matzo?"
"Ah, yes," replied the Rabbi calmly, "we actually collect up all the crumbs from the matzo and when we have enough, we send them in a box back to the manufacturer and every now and then, they send a whole box of matzo balls."
"Oh," replied the auditor, thinking hard how to fluster the Rabbi."Well, Rabbi," he went on," what do you do with all the foreskins from the circumcisions?"
"Yes, here too, we do not waste," answered the Rabbi. "What we do is save up all the foreskins, and when we have enough we actually send them to the Tax Office, and about once a year they send us a complete d!ck like you."

fp


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## laotsu42 (Jan 5, 2004)

that joke is awsome ...

thanks fp ...


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## -kelly- (Mar 11, 2004)

Finch Platte said:


> TT was kind enough to post about this thread in another forum, so I had to take a look.
> 
> The Tax Office sends their auditor to a synagogue.
> The auditor is doing all the checks and then turns to the rabbi and says, "I noticed that you buy a lot of candles."
> ...


Good one fp! I had to copy it and send it out to the family  Are you MOT?


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## Finch Platte (Nov 14, 2003)

*Sorry?*



kellyinutah said:


> Good one fp! I had to copy it and send it out to the family  Are you MOT?


Dunno what MOT means...

fp


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## Sabine (Jan 12, 2004)

Finch Platte said:


> Dunno what MOT means...
> 
> fp


Uhhh, duh, its "Milk, Oil, Trampoline"

sheesh.

Sabine


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## Ken in KC (Jan 12, 2004)

*Sorry...*



screampint said:


> Naw, as soon as I got a mountain bike I turned into a toadface cow! Before I was so attractive.... Oh well, at least my bike loves me.


Your bike loves Justin now. Sorry.

Edit: Sorry to drag the post back up. Should have emailed this directly to Sarah. Since I'm compunding the problem by editing, I will say that Catzilla is one of the funniest people I've come across on this here internet thingy. Thanks for making me spit water on my screen............... twice.

Ken


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## Cary (Dec 29, 2003)

Finch Platte said:


> Dunno what MOT means...
> 
> fp


If you don't know what is means, your not.


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## jeffj (Jan 13, 2004)

From a "goyem" (sp?) no less:

MOT = Member of The Tribe (Jewish)

If he has to ask, he's likely not...Hey, (if Kelly is a female) is she hitting on him?


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## screampint (Dec 10, 2001)

Who's Justin?  

Jordan is allowed to ride the FS all he wants, but he doesn't dare lay a hand on my Glitter!


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## NumbNutz (Apr 8, 2004)

*Every girl on a bike is gorgeous.*



Christine said:


> Every girl on a bike is gorgeous. True for every guy as well. Except when they make sexist remarks. Tsk tsk.


Couldn't have said it better Christine.


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